It seems another problem has been uncovered and identified by the political correct police in the marines. The problem is audible farting. It seems audible farting upsets the Afghans.

The Military Times reports “audible farting has been banned for some Marines downrange because it offends the Afghans.“

The first thing that came to mind when I read about the fart ban was how could an Afghan who lives in a mud hut, cooks over a yak dung fire, and sees nothing wrong with honor his daughter be offended by a fart. The second thing was why are only “downrange” marines covered by the ban. What down downrange mean? Are up range marines exempt from the ban?

What will the downrange marines do? Try to hold their farts until they are no longer downrange? Or will they try to sneak a silent but deadly gas belch? If a marine lifts a heavy object and a fart he has been holding slips out will he be punished? What would the punishment be?

Can a special MRE be developed that contains no roughage that might induce farting. These special MREs would be available to downrange marines. How about an unauthorized fart? What about repeat offenders or serial farters? Will a marine be expected to turn in his buddy if he farts illegally? If an Afghan complains about a marine fart and the marine denies it, will it take a court to resolve the conflict? Will the fart ban spread to other branches of the military?

These questions are far beyond the capabilities of my mind. I hope the military can work things out.

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